


A Tiny Predicament

by MoWolf



Category: We Happy Few (Video Game)
Genre: "What's the worst that can happen?", Arthur gets turned into a child, Bullshit Science, No one knows what's going on, That's what, child!Arthur, everything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-09-23
Packaged: 2019-07-15 19:39:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16069913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoWolf/pseuds/MoWolf
Summary: A purely self-indulgent fic in which Arthur is turned into a toddler and let loose on the Parade District. No one even remembers how to properly take care of a toddler and no one knows what to do with him so they just do their best. Which, admittedly, isn't all that great...





	A Tiny Predicament

Was that-?

No.

It couldn’t be!

Evans rubbed his eyes and blinked rapidly. Perhaps he was too tired. This was his first time patrolling for the night shift, after all. And he’d had difficulty sleeping, what with the nerves of being new on the job and all that. So perhaps this was just a hallucination brought on by stress. Yes. That had to be it.

He looked over and… Ah. Nope, still there.

Okay, new strategy. 

He looked around until he spotted another constable ambling towards him. He waved his hand and called, “You there!” He was too aggressive and he realized that as soon as he spoke, but it was too late now. Ignoring the suddenly tense posture of the other bobby, he waved for the man to come over and pointed. “Do you see that?”

“What on Earth has you so riled up?” the other bobby asked, tensed up and weapon drawn. Until he saw what Evans was pointing at. He straightened up and cocked his head. “No. No, it’s can’t be. Is that-”

“So you see it too?” Okay, not a hallucination. Definitely real. Definitely there.

Definitely a child playing in a puddle.

The two officers stared in silent confusion. The child was very young. Four, maybe five years old. He was also dressed only in a large shirt that was entirely too large and looked more like an awkward gown. The neckhole was slipped over one shoulder and the child kept pulling it back up only to have it fall off his shoulder again shortly after as he played.

The boy was surprisingly quiet. Evans couldn’t remember anything about children, but he had a vague feeling that one that young should have been much louder. Instead, the only noise came from the splashing of chubby hands and the nearby rubber duck.

Several moments passed before the two officers finally pulled themselves out of their stupor and approached. Evans knelt down in the front of the child and smiled. “Hello there. What are you doing here?”

“I found a puddle!” the boy replied, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Which, well, it kind of was. But that wasn’t the question Evans wanted answered.

“No, no. I mean,” he gave a small wave of his hand, “what are you doing _here_?”

“What he means, is how did you get here? Where did you come from?” the other officer said.

The boy stopped splashing around and finally looked up at the two men properly. His head cocked as he thought. “I walked.” He turned and pointed down the road toward an alley that was difficult to see in the dark. “I woke up down there.” Finally he stood up and began swinging his arms idlely. His shirt was a mess of mud stains and water and the two officers chuckled at the mess. “Are you here to take me home?”

They looked at each other and then back at the child. That… wasn’t such a bad idea, actually. It would lead them to whomever had the kid in the first place, an important feat that the doctors would want to know about for sure. After all, the populace was supposed to be sterile, from what he understood. Though no one could remember if that was a side-effect of long-term Joy use or if the Germans had released something in the water.

But that was a thought for another time. Evans smiled at the boy and said, “Of course! It’s too late for good citizens to be out. Let’s get you home.” As he stood up, he held out his hand which the boy happily latched on to. It was as he stood up all the way that two distinct problems presented themselves.

For starters, the boy was short. As in, even standing on his tippy-toes, he wasn’t tall enough for Evans to stand up all the way _and_ remain holding his hand. This particular problem was easily solved, however, when the boy gave a tremendous yawn and lifted his other hand with a little grabbing motion. Evans happily scooped the boy up who began loudly chattering away about Rick the Stunt Duck while repeatedly smashing the rubber duck against the side of the bobby’s face and laughing whenever the duck squeaked.

The second problem was immediately presented whenever the officer’s questioned the boy as to where “home” even was, to which every variation of the question was responded with a distracted, “I’unno,” immediately followed by the continuation of whatever train of thought had been interrupted.

The long and the short of it was that Evans now had a strange child on his hands and he had no idea what to do. One the one hand, he could easily just drop the child off with the doctors and hope for the best. On the other hand…

Children hadn’t been around on the island for some 20-odd years. Some desperate little part of him wanted to keep the child for himself. It wouldn’t be hard. The other citizens would be just as excited and happy to let the lad run around. And he was already so cheerful! Hell, having the lad might even boost his popularity!

“What’s your name, son?” he asked cheerfully and gave the boy a little bounce.

At the bounce, the lad laughed and wrapped his arms firmly around Evans’ neck. Once he’d gotten his giggling under control again and had the question repeated, he replied, “Art’ur! An’ I’m four years old!” He even held up four fingers proudly. Such a big boy!

“Well then, Arthur. How about you come home with me tonight, okay?”

“‘Kay!”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” the other officer asked softly. His eyes darted about nervously, as if they were doing something highly illegal. Which they probably were, but who knew at this point!

“Of course!” Evans replied lightly as he started towards his own home. “Besides, what’s the worst that can happy?”


End file.
